We, the men of S.O.D.S, have dedicated our lives to watching the worst movies possible simply to spare you, gentle reader, the dangers associated with such dreck. Using a combination of military-grade safety gear and near-lethal levels of intoxication to preserve our delicate brains from the horror, we've watched almost 50 movies — so you didn't have to.

It's time to watch our 50th movie. And we'd like your help.

On August 18th, 2006, Snakes On a Plane, starring cinematic legend Samuel L. Jackson, will be released to the world. We have it on good authority that this movie involves a single plane and more than one snake, and that Samuel L. Jackson wants those motherfucking snakes off his motherfucking plane. To make your first experience of this instant cult classic as copacetic as possible,

we're inviting you and your friends to a private, opening night screening.

To cushion your mind against the horrors and the expert retouchings of almost a half a dozen screenwriters,

we will have a fully staffed open bar in the theater with us.

Unfortunately, SODS 50 is sold out. You may want to get on our mailing list for our pals and fellow travellers, where last minute ticket miracles might happen.

So come, get drunk, and marvel in the spectacle of the best bad movie of the year with a few hundred of your closest friends. Our showing will be at 8pm on opening night, the evening of August 18th, at San Francisco’s 1000 Van Ness. Tickets are $25 per person, which includes your movie ticket, and all the booze you can drink during the show.

You must arrive between 7:00pm and 7:45pm. You will find members of the SODS Ground Crew gesturing wildly with runway flashlights in the lobby, who will have a clipboard and your tickets. You will show us something official looking with the name you ordered your tickets under, and we'll give them to you.

If you are ordering for multiple people, please pick up all the tickets from us and distribute them to your party (we will be running around like passengers on a plane full of snakes and won't be able to do this for you).

Theater doors open at 7:30pm. No one will be admitted after 8pm unless you've made specific prior arrangements to be met in the lobby by one of us.

You may also want to get on our mailing list for our pals and fellow travellers, where we will announce any last minute details related to the event.

Special thanks and respect to Dean Gaudet, Dan Sully and Rachel Perkins, who taught the SODS how much fun it is to see a movie in a theater full of friends with their special showings of The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Thanks for the inspiration guys!